16 and Married

Just about a month ago, Ganga, one of the oldest girls here, graduated from high school and moved out of New Hope. We were sad to see her leave but were confident that she had big things in her future. She is a very intelligent and hard-working girl, who spent 7 days a week from early morning until after the sun set studying hard, and taking extra classes at her english medium school. There is no doubt that she could achieve anything she sets her mind to. About a week ago we received some disturbing news. Ganga was to be married on May 5th, a union arranged by her step-mother in exchange for a dowry of a few acres of land. Ganga had been living at New Hope since the age of six and George was like a father to her, so you can imagine he was very upset by the news. He did all in his power to stop the illegal nuptials (both bride and groom are minors) but the wedding carried on despite his efforts, and without his attendance. Ganga had planned to come along when it was time for her younger sisters Gayathri and Anjali to return after summer break, but sadly we missed her lovely face when they arrived yesterday, and now may not see her again.

Ganga, just a child a few months ago, posing with her favorite animal at the zoo.

Although things like this are often the norm in India, I myself cannot even come close to relating. I can't imagine marrying someone whom I do not love, spending the rest of my life with someone that someone else has chosen, and losing my freedom at such a young age. I find myself thinking back to when I was 16 and my priorities were drastically different from Ganga's. My biggest concerns were acquiring my drivers license, petty arguments with my teenage boyfriend, what I would wear to the prom, and how I would perform at my next gymnastics meet -- definitely not a last minute wedding that I had no say over, becoming a wife and homemaker, and the most-likely frightening thoughts of what will happen after the ceremony, with a man I don't even know. Ganga is a girl that has shown so much promise, conviction, and devotion; a young lady with a passion for song and dance, who now may not have the choices or opportunity to follow her dreams. It makes me sad not only for Ganga, but for a nation that is still so caught up in ancient binding traditions and oppressive institutions that keep young women from their aspirations, goals, dreams, and desires. It is no life to live, one that is sure to be filled with dull sorrow and regret.

Ganga and Nina in the back of the truck on the way home from Lenti's christening

My heart goes out to Ganga in a time when she must feel so alone and exploited, traded like livestock for a piece of land. It is disturbing and upsetting, and quite a shock for us who just weeks ago were congratulating this beautiful young girl on what she has accomplished thus far and optimistic for her promising future. Just weeks ago she had the world at her fingertips. I am sure that Ganga will make the best of her situation, to learn to love the man that she is forced to spend the rest of her life with and create a better life for her family than she had for herself. But it doesn't ease the helplessness we all feel (especially George, her father figure for so many years) in not being able to do anything to rescue her.